Music of the Spheres. by Russell T Davies

From the BBC Proms, broadcast on BBC Radio 3 on 27 July 2008

Music Of The Spheres
First transmitted live in sound-only form
on BBC Radio 3 from 11.40 to 11.50 AM

(FREEMA AGYEMAN who played companion Martha Jones is on stage at the Royal Albert Hall.)
FREEMA AGYEMAN: This year marks the fiftieth anniversary of the BBC Radiophonic Workshop. It was these musical pioneers who created the most famous theme tune of all time. Listen out for their work in this next section, which will then take us to the interval. But now, we've got a special treat for you. This is truly exciting. We're going to hear from the man himself. In a worldwide exclusive, never seen before, especially for you, here's a brand new mini adventure starring that wanderer from Gallifrey, the Doctor. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, today at the Royal Albert Hall, here is the premiere of Music Of The Spheres.

(A sketch is played on a monitor screen. It starts with the Doctor Who opening title sequence and the latest version of the theme tune played by Murray Gold.)



by Russell T Davies

(A quill pen is writing music on a sheet of paper, THE DOCTOR is singing softly to himself while lying on the floor of the TARDIS control room, quill pen in hand, bottle of black ink beside him, sheets of music on the floor in front of him.)


(THE DOCTOR whistles a tune, and writes the music, then puts the feather into the ink bottle then stands rapidly, gathering the music sheets, some of them, and putting them on a music stand. Behind him there is an alarm sound from the console.)
THE DOCTOR: Not now, I'm busy.


(The bleeps continue. THE DOCTOR sighs in irritation, and turns to the console.)
THE DOCTOR: Oh, all right then, what?
(He checks the console, a message flashes up)ALERT
(THE DOCTOR stares at the message.)
THE DOCTOR: What? ... What?!
(As he stares uncomprehendingly, there is a flash of light as THE GRASKE is transported down from above into the console room. THE DOCTOR turns to face the creature, standing upright.)
THE DOCTOR: Oi! Get out of my TARDIS! I let down the defences for one second.
(THE GRASKE is a small creature about three feet eight inches in height, with dark clothing, pink/brown face with three tentacles growing out of its head and hanging down the back. The voice is deep.)
THE GRASKE: Must speak to the Doctor.
THE DOCTOR: I don't care. You're a Graske, and a Graske is trouble.
(He inclines his head towards the right.)
(THE GRASKE looks up, listening to the gentle sighing sound like a breeze, but melodic.)
THE GRASKE: But that noise - beautiful sound in the air. What is it?
(THE DOCTOR looks up, listening, walks over to THE GRASKE.)
THE DOCTOR: If you must know, that's the music of the spheres.
THE GRASKE: Music of the spheres, is what?
(THE DOCTOR crouches down to be on the same level as THE GRASKE.)
THE DOCTOR: Well - you get all those planets revolving round suns, and all those suns revolving round in a Galaxy, and all those Galaxies revolving round each other. If you take the gravity patterns, feed them through the TARDIS harmonic filter that, Mr Graske, is the sound of the Universe.
(THE DOCTOR looks up, lost in the sound.)
THE GRASKE: Universe? Sounds wonderful.
(THE DOCTOR grins.)
THE DOCTOR: Yeah. Does, doesn't it...
(He snaps out of it and jumps up.)
THE DOCTOR: But you're still not staying.
THE GRASKE: No. Graske came to warn you.
THE DOCTOR: About what?
(THE GRASKE points behind THE DOCTOR.)
THE GRASKE: About that.
(THE DOCTOR turns as a black hole begins to appear in the middle of the wall of the TARDIS, not far from the doors.)
THE DOCTOR: Oh! Now ... that looks like a space portal.
THE GRASKE: Told you - danger.
THE DOCTOR: Nah, it's harmless.
(THE DOCTOR walks over to it.)
THE DOCTOR: Just a hole in space.
(THE DOCTOR crouches to look at it.)
THE DOCTOR: But I wonder what's on the other side?
(THE DOCTOR walks over, so does THE GRASKE. THE DOCTOR looks out. He is now, effectively, facing the watching audience.)
(He looks right up at the camera, looking round.)
THE DOCTOR: Where's that, then? Who are all those people?
(Laughter from the audience.)
THE DOCTOR: Hold on. That looks like - is that the Albert Hall?
(More laughter and cheering. THE DOCTOR speaks louder.)
THE DOCTOR: I said is that the Albert Hall?
(Some start to say "yes.")
THE DOCTOR: I said, is that the Albert Hall?
(Louder audience reaction, saying "Yes.")
(THE DOCTOR grins.)
THE DOCTOR: Oh, brilliant. Hello.
(He waves.)
THE DOCTOR: I said, hello!
(Some say "hello." THE DOCTOR shakes his head.)
THE DOCTOR: No, no, no, sorry, sorry, you'll have to shout. I said, hello-ah!
(The audience shout "Hello!" THE DOCTOR laughs.)
THE DOCTOR: Listen. My name's the Doctor, I'm a Time Lord, but that is an awful lot of people. What are you all doing there? Oh!
(He raises a forefinger.)
THE DOCTOR: Wait a minute, it's the Proms, is that the Proms? Are you in the Proms?
(The audience call back "yes.".)
THE DOCTOR: Oh! I love the Proms, I was at the very first Proms.
(Scratching behind his ear.)
THE DOCTOR: Eighteen Ninety-Five, I played the tuba. I was brilliant.
(Some laughter. THE DOCTOR leans over.)
THE DOCTOR: Is that the orchestra down there?
(Sudden realisation, he raises his hands.)
THE DOCTOR: Oh! Wait there!
(THE DOCTOR runs across the control room, grabs most of the sheets of music from the stand, and runs back clutching them to face the camera again.)
THE DOCTOR: Because...
(He clears his throat self-importantly.)
THE DOCTOR: Funny thing is, I've just been composing something myself.
(He holds up the music sheets.)
THE DOCTOR: I said to Beethoven, I can rattle off a tune, he said "Pardon?"
(Some of the audience laugh.)
THE DOCTOR: But - I've just been inspired by the music of the spheres. I've written my own symphony. Yeah! And, if I can send these pages through the portal, then the orchestra can play it. A brand-new piece of music, composed by me. Ready for this, orchestra? Stand by. Three, two, one!
(THE DOCTOR tosses the papers towards the camera ... and in the live Proms sheets of paper come down which are gathered up.)
THE DOCTOR: That's it, that's it.
(THE DOCTOR waits as they pick up the papers. Some in the audience applaud.)
THE DOCTOR: There you go, hurry up!
(THE DOCTOR waits, exhales impatiently.)
THE DOCTOR: This portal isn't gonna stay open for long. Right...
(THE DOCTOR indicates with his finger.)
THE DOCTOR: Now, so...
(He holds up his hands.)
THE DOCTOR: Er, if you don't mind...
(THE DOCTOR reaches into his inside jacket pocket.)
THE DOCTOR: ... Mr Conductor...
(THE DOCTOR takes out his sonic screwdriver.)
THE DOCTOR: ... Stand down.
(THE DOCTOR extends the sonic screwdriver. Ben Foster the conductor walks off.)
THE DOCTOR: I'm in charge of this one. Quiet please.
(THE DOCTOR behaves like a conductor with a baton.)
THE DOCTOR: Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh! Silence, settle down.
(Pointing suddenly to the top left of the screen)
THE DOCTOR: Oi - settle down.
(The orchestra prepare the new music sheets.)
THE DOCTOR: So ... ladies and gentlemen, and children, this is the worldwide premiere of "Ode To The Universe." And...
(THE DOCTOR with eyes closed, conducts. Music plays, which is like the sound made by an orchestra when tuning the instruments. A very short piece lasting only a few seconds, THE DOCTOR waving his arms throughout, then waves cut just as the music stops.)
THE DOCTOR: Oh, come on, that was brilliant!
(THE DOCTOR tosses his sonic screwdriver and puts it away, basking in applause.)
THE DOCTOR: Thank you. I thank you. No, no, no, I thank you, really. You're too kind. Ah! You see, Graske...
(THE DOCTOR turns - THE GRASKE is not there.)
THE DOCTOR: That's the thing about planet Earth ... What?
(THE DOCTOR runs,)
(THE DOCTOR runs round the console.)
THE DOCTOR: Where's he gone? Ooh!
(The Graske starts to appear in the Albert Hall. THE DOCTOR stops by the portal and faces us, out of breath.)
THE DOCTOR: I've lost the Graske. He must have slipped through the portal. Have you seen him?
(THE DOCTOR looks down to the left.)
THE DOCTOR: Oh! There he is.
(THE GRASKE fires the water pistol at Ben Foster.)
THE DOCTOR: Albert Hall, you've got a Graske on the loose.
(THE DOCTOR feels his jacket pockets in surprise.)
THE DOCTOR: Oh - oh - oh!
(THE DOCTOR looks round, then back, throwing up his hands.)
THE DOCTOR: And he's stolen my water pistol.
(A cellist is having to defend herself with her cello as THE GRASKE fires the water pistol at her then other people in the orchestra.)
THE DOCTOR: Oi! Graske, stop it, behave!
(THE GRASKE hears this and shakes his head.)
THE DOCTOR: Oh! He wasn't trying to warn me, he was trying to find a shortcut to Earth. If he escapes he'll go round the whole planet, causing trouble, stealing sweets, making smells...
(THE DOCTOR throws up his hands and rushes over to the console.)
THE DOCTOR: Hold on, hold on, hold on.
(THE DOCTOR turns a knob, twists a coral dial.)
THE DOCTOR: Just gonna reverse the polarity of the neutron flow, and pull that Graske...
(THE DOCTOR pulls a lever.)
THE DOCTOR: ... Back into the TARDIS!
(There is a flash and smoke in the Albert Hall. THE GRASKE falls from the portal into the console room. THE DOCTOR cries out in triumph and dashes round to another control panel.)
THE GRASKE: Not fair!
THE DOCTOR: Ho-ho! I'll give you not fair. I'm gonna reverse flip that teleport, and send you all the way to the other side of the Galaxy!
(THE GRASKE protests, but THE DOCTOR aims the sonic screwdriver at THE GRASKE, making a circling motion with it. It whirrs. THE GRASKE cries out, and vanishes in a blip of light. THE DOCTOR throws up the sonic screwdriver and puts it back in his jacket pocket, then walks back over to face the audience again.)
THE DOCTOR: Right. Well, that was fun. And a little bit mad. But...
(THE DOCTOR holds out a hand.)
THE DOCTOR: I - I - I've got to close this portal before there's any more trouble. It's nice to see you all.
(He makes to turn away, but turns back.)
THE DOCTOR: But one more thing. Just remember. Music isn't just orchestras and pop stars and ... special people with albums and downloads and concerts. It's you. 'Cause the music of the spheres is all around you.
(He looks round.)
THE DOCTOR: When you're on your own, just close your eyes, and you'll hear it. Music, inside your head. 'Cause everyone's a musician. Everyone's got a song inside them. Every single one of you. Bye!
(THE DOCTOR walks off to the right.)

(The closing theme music composed by Ron Grainer plays over the credits as the audience applaud.)


The Doctor

The Graske

Voice of The Graske

(It continues with the rest of the behind the scenes credits and also includes among these)
with thanks to the BBC
National Orchestra of Wales
(and also the following)
(and finally)
(The final caption in black)

BBC Wales


Transcribed by David Tait

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